The Hunger

Question for the readers.  What happens when you have a hungry blogger, trapped in a library with a Poo Bird that doesn't want to get dinner yet?  The blogger is likely to do any number of things, most scarily, he is likely to blog about his hunger and perhaps even adapt a speech from a college quarterback to describe his hunger.  This is exactly what I've done.  Tim Tebow gave a speech, called "The Promise," to Florida football fans.  (pictured below)  I have made slight alterations to describe my hunger.  Please address any complaints to the Poo Bird, as this ridiculous blog post could have been avoided had she wanted to eat earlier.

 

Renowned Blogger's version:

The Hunger

To the readers and everybody in

Wiggle Nation, I'm hungry.

I'm extremely hungry.  I am 

hoping for an uneaten pizza.

To put in my hole, something

I haven't done for hours.

I promise you one thing, a lot

of food will come into me.

You will never see any blogger in

the entire country chew as hard

as I will chew the rest of the

evening.  You will never see

someone push the rest of the

food in their mouth as hard as I will push

it the rest of the evening.

You will never see a blogger

eat harder than I will 

the rest of the evening.

What a mess.

- Renowned Blogger

 I would like to point out that Tebow gave this speech on my (and Allie's) birthday.  Is this a coincidence?  I think not.  My hunger and his promise are of equal importance and demand the same attention.